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Me, 1974: Age 3
It seems odd to say that I’ve been working in recent years to become more feminine; after all, I am a female. However, I have always exhibited many more stereotypical male traits, and softening the edges is a journey. Although journeys in life are hardly ever completed, I hesitate to say I am here. I feel more like a “girl” today than I think I ever have in my life.
I think the awakening came recently when a few people called me pretty, even beautiful. The little girl inside me squealed with delight at those words. See, my parents never really doted on me in that way; instead, I was called “thunder thighs” and got the message I was never good enough. Although I moved past that many years ago, the little girl inside me is still there, and she is eager for praise.
I’ve also recently been wearing more “girly” clothes, even heels. I used to dress more business professional back in Western NY, but AZ is so casual that for many years my wardrobe has consisted of jeans and stretchy, comfortable clothes. I’m slowly expanding my horizons to include heels, form-fitting dresses, and clothes that showcase my figure, which I think is pretty nice.
While I read romantic fiction in my teens, I gave that up because I believed the fantasy couldn’t come true. Now, though, I am reading Nicholas Sparks’ The Choice and finding myself engrossed. Who am I to say fantasies cannot come true? There’s no rule that I cannot believe in achieving a happily ever after while still staying grounded in my day-to-day life.
That little girl is back, and I am happy to welcome her. I am comfortable with being feminine and enjoying all of the perks that come with being a woman. And I am still balancing that with the necessity of being a single mom and business owner—and I am loving both sides of it. I am proud to be a well rounded, complete human being who embodies all of the great traits I have.
And a decent dose of humor and sarcasm certainly helps to brighten the picture.